We’ve all been there, am I right guys? None of that bullshit from Lyra though. She never complains that you forgot to take out the trash, or that you left the toilet seat up again or that your balls smell like a stripper’s ass. Lyra doesn’t judge, she just loves you for who you are. That ass is worth $500 at best.Īs far as ponies go, Lyra is pretty cute, and while $700 may be a large investment, in the grand scheme of things it is a pretty good price for a faithful lifetime sexual partner who never has a headache at the wrong time. If that wasn’t enough to convince you that we are doomed as a people, the auction closed with a winning bid of about $700. For those that are unaware, Lyra is a background character in the MLP universe that was made into a plush character with an ‘easy access‘ hole in her bum and auctioned off by her creator in 2012. One of the first MLP sex toys to arrive on the scene and become noticed, at least online was the infamous ‘magic Lyra plushie’. It is a bit of a misnomer though since there really is no ‘official’ sex doll, in fact, Hasbro, the toy company behind the real MLP denounces the sexualization of the ponies, since at least traditionally, MLP is a product for children and the sexualization of anything that is even closely associated with children seems like a dangerous precedent and may pose a risk to our children. Most sites refer to these MLP sex dolls as ‘unofficial’ or ‘bootleg’ products. You can like the show and collect the toys without wanting to have sex with a horse. Bet ya didn’t think you would learn that today huh?Īnd you think your garage sales are embarrassingĪs a public service to the Bronies out there, please note that not all Bronies are Cloppers. Yes sir that is right, we have a generation of men ‘waxing their surfboards’ to the image of a cartoon horse. Cloppers, in this context, incorporate My Little Pony into their sex lives in the forms of sex dolls, sex toys and costumes. However not all is innocent as it seems in Ponyville… There exists a subset of the Bronies, known as ‘cloppers’ that take it that extra step and derive sexual pleasure from the characters in the show. Let’s keep it real – The show has great characters, a fun story, is filled with great messages, showcases awesome animation and to be honest is pretty damn funny when it wants to be. Fluttershy said it best, “if you just keep your head high, do your best and believe in yourself, anything can happen.” Live the dream my Bronie friends! Live the dream … of playing with girl toys…
There are plenty of things I like that are considered either lame or boring or criminal and I don’t let any of that stop me, and it shouldn’t stop you either. Don’t get me wrong, I have no issue with Bronies – like what you like and don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong.
For the record, I like Jem and the Holograms, but I don’t feel the need to be referred to as a ‘Bro-logram’, so to me, the distinction between what a male or female fan is to be called is pretty stupid, a fan is a fan. They are likely called other things too, but I doubt they would want me to repeat any of that here. These males are generally referred to as ‘Bronies’, because a boy who likes a cartoon pony show for girls needs to have a label assigned to them apparently.
Since the original 1983 My Little Pony line was released, nearly every generation of children have been exposed to the world of our favourite pony friends through toys, books and TV (technically the show didn’t become a series until ’86, but toys and TV specials were available earlier.) While the original My Little Pony show is generally described as a series for girls, the latest incarnation, ‘Friendship is Magic’, seems to have attracted not only the expected female audience, but has also managed to find a large male fan base as well. I recommend you read it while hiding in the bathroom. It’s not exactly pornographic, but looking at images of sex dolls at work is still a bad idea.
This review is absolutely not for children and contains a few pictures that are NSFW. So “what the Hell does My Little Pony have to do with sex?” Let’s find out…Īs you can imagine by the title alone, this particular rubbish review is going to get a little blue. Either way, again, you are probably aware of sex. Perhaps you had sex at some point and now are imprisoned with children that make you spend hundreds of dollars on God-damn pony toys or perhaps you were smart enough to use protection. Either way – you are probably aware of MLP. Perhaps you or your children are a fan of our equestrian heroes or alternatively, you may despise the series, based on the fact it is popular, or for an actually valid reason. Chances are, you have heard of My Little Pony (MLP). Today’s topic will be about real sex toys based on the popular cartoon and toy line for kids.